What Comes First? An Exploration of Identity

         For some time, I have been personally struggling with a question about Jewish identity.  The topic is complicated, controversial and, in addressing it here, my intention is to promote thought and conversation.  I reserve the right to change my mind, about what I say in this column!  And, in what I consider to be among the holiest words in the English language: “I might be wrong.”

         Maybe it was prompted by all this rhetoric of “America First” – knowing full well that the phrase comes loaded with baggage, echoes of its isolationist and antisemitic roots in relation to both World Wars in the 20^th century.  Or the old game we played in youth group: “Are you an American Jew or a Jewish American?”  Which is the noun, and which the adjective?  Which the modifier and which the core? Which could theoretically change, and which is simply who you are?

         I believe in Jewish unity.   I do believe, somehow, at some level, that, as a Jew, I have something in common with a Yemenite-born taxi driver in Israel, or a Charedi (ultra-Orthodox Jew) who does not consider what I do to be Jewish… something that, actually, I do not have in common with a non-Jewish neighbor. 

         Now, this is a very controversial statement.  Among other reasons why it is so "out there" is that it is really not obvious.  Clearly, culturally, often politically, and in every usual measure of lifestyle and values, what we share with neighbors who are similar to us in every way except for faith is very deep.   What ties us together as Jews, that thread of Jewish commonality I am referring to…  is very hard to see.  It pulls, it tugs, but still we can’t quite grasp it when we look for it.  It is not belief (some Jews are atheists, many others agnostics, some are deeply pious), it is not shared values (some Jews are... never mind that).  So what is it?

         One more caveat – a very important one.  This… sense of commonality I am referring to is made even more complicated by a related but not identical issue: intermarriage.  The fact that there are so many members of so many of our families who are not Jewish truly “complexifies” this search for the elusive thread of Jewish unity.   

         For now, then, I suppose what I am saying is… there is something in common between any families with any Jewish members in it.  Even if, perhaps, that pull is not felt powerfully in our day to day lives.  

         We are so different from one another.  What could that unity be?  Is it something nebulous and impossible to define?  It is simply a shared past, and the sense of some kind of common destiny still?

         The stakes are high here.  I believe that the entire Zionist enterprise, the notion of Israel as a Jewish homeland rests not on religious belief, but the notion of a Jewish people, the idea that there is something which unites us as Jews which transcends behavior and belief.

         My sense of being Jewish is central to who I am.  But is it all of it?  And what other commitments clash with that?

A few years ago the question was posed to me in a different way.  If I had the hypothetical choice between being Orthodox, or not being Jewish at all, what would I choose?  After a lot of thought, comforting myself with some very positive experiences with the progressive cutting edge of the so-called “modern Orthodox” world, or among the "open Orthodox," I came up with an answer.  

 But then the question was pushed further still.  If I had to choose between being ultra-Orthodox, or not being Jewish at all...?

All I can say in response to that is to duck the question, or redefine the parameters.  I cannot envision that scenario.  

I believe in Jewish unity.  But/and…  There are core parts of my being and my own belief system which I view as part of my Jewish identity, rather than apart from it.  There are values I hold which, if forced to put aside, would simply not be Judaism as I understand it.

I share some of those values with you now.  

Part of my Jewish core is egalitarianism, the belief in equal roles, rights and responsibilities for all, affirmed at a certain age (Bar or Bat Mitzvah, whether one has a ceremony or not), but regardless of gender. 

Another is a belief in history.  I believe that Jewish life, culture, perspectives, attitudes and sacred texts grow in and over time.  I believe in building a bridge between yesterday and today, between the world of text and tradition and the lives we lead in any given time period.

         A third is a connection to humanity as a whole.  Even as I work on behalf of a Jewish community and to promote a Jewish future, my core beliefs include a sense of the dignity of all life, that all human beings – all of us, of all colors and creed, races and religion, all of us are made in the image of God.  Yes, I believe there is something special about being Jewish and I want to encourage Jewish choices and Jewish life – but I do not believe in a fundamental, ontological, inherent  and unalterable difference in the “souls” of one group of human beings from any other. 

Finally, for now, my core beliefs include the impulse towards involvement with the world, the work to make this world a better place, even while recognizing that different people will be moved to do this in very different ways.  Yes, progressive Jews use this term so much that it is easy to mock it.  But I believe in the obligation of tikkun olam.

 

 I believe in history and growth, in tradition and change, in science and spirituality, in the Jewish people and a connection with all of creation, in self-interest and in standing up for others.  And I believe that all can be held, with love, in the palms of an open hand, with open hearts and open minds.

What comes first, and what is secondary?  What binds us together, and what tears us apart?  Who am I, and who are you?

No final answers, and even how we respond, or what we feel about this, may change, for each of us, over time.